As i watch re-runs of M*A*S*H on netflix, i reminisce, a thousand memories flood my mind, these are the same re-runs i grew up watching. I had the good fortune to see Loretta Swit in Shirley Valentine when i first came to Canada, the major was still going strong.
These-days i think about the past a lot, how different my life could have been, had i taken a different road, but circumstances led to me being where i am right now, of course circumstances coupled with indiscretions on my own part.Call it fate or eventuality it is what it is, or maybe i am just going through a mid-life crisis :)
I had an interesting talk with my dad recently, mainly about religion and God. He is a firm believer, and believes it is jesus who will resolve all the problems in our lives, i on the other hand.... well i am who i am, i do not believe in organized religion. That being said i have always respected people who believe and stand up for their faith as long as we are not talking about the crazies who want to wage war on the rest of the world, but normal God fearing people. Well anyway, the talk led me to question myself, is my life the way it is because i do not go to church, i do not pray etc. ?
I thought about it long and hard and i came to the conclusion that, no its not because i do not go to church or have memorized the bible that my life is the way it is, its because i chose to make it the way it is. Life events have influenced my thought process and that is how life is, some have it good, some have it hard!, i fall in the latter category but then then i am among the lucky ones ,there are millions or even billions out there who are worse! and most of them are where they are in life through not their actions, but pure fate!
Anyway that is it i guess for this post, just needed to write something!
Aug 15, 2015
Jun 21, 2015
The need to write....
I felt the need to write again, i know i neglect the blog, but it comes handy when i do feel the urge to scribble.I sometimes wonder what life has become and how different it could have been, i look around myself and i see people i know, friends and family and they have their own families, they are settled in life and i guess in a way leading a normal life. Which leads me to question myself, why am i not one of them? why have i always shied away from leading a life which meant having a family, having kids etc. ? instead here i am, alone, sometimes the loneliness gets to me and today i guess is one of those days....
But would i ever be comfortable in a life like that, that is the question i ask myself, over and over again and the answer is a resounding NO, my genetic makeup seems to be different, i like my independence, i like to be free, i hate being tied down, its just not me, maybe just maybe i can find a companion in life who thinks the way i do, who enjoys the same things i do and loves her independence just as i do mine, so far the search has been unsuccessful but i can always hope....
I feel disgusted these days, because of the world we live in, there is so much violence, poverty, hunger and death all around us, why is it that we as humans cannot learn to co-exist with each other, why do we want more, enough is never enough, there is always a hunger for more, the rich get richer, the poor get poorer, the religious zealots use religion as a weapon, there is no place for spirituality anymore, everything seems to be fake, no one cares about the starving hungry child and if we do care its because our religion says so or maybe we think we have done something good, we feel the satisfaction, there are very few selfless people left in this world....
I propose a society free of money, religion, poverty, where there is plenty for all to eat, where disputes are settled by diplomacy and talk, instead of killing and death. The rule of the jungle does not apply anymore, i know its just a Utopian dream but maybe just maybe we will have such a world one day, devoid of hate, where everyone loves the other and we all co-exist in peace....
Anyway i think i have written enough, maybe will post again soon, it did feel good to write a few lines!
But would i ever be comfortable in a life like that, that is the question i ask myself, over and over again and the answer is a resounding NO, my genetic makeup seems to be different, i like my independence, i like to be free, i hate being tied down, its just not me, maybe just maybe i can find a companion in life who thinks the way i do, who enjoys the same things i do and loves her independence just as i do mine, so far the search has been unsuccessful but i can always hope....
I feel disgusted these days, because of the world we live in, there is so much violence, poverty, hunger and death all around us, why is it that we as humans cannot learn to co-exist with each other, why do we want more, enough is never enough, there is always a hunger for more, the rich get richer, the poor get poorer, the religious zealots use religion as a weapon, there is no place for spirituality anymore, everything seems to be fake, no one cares about the starving hungry child and if we do care its because our religion says so or maybe we think we have done something good, we feel the satisfaction, there are very few selfless people left in this world....
I propose a society free of money, religion, poverty, where there is plenty for all to eat, where disputes are settled by diplomacy and talk, instead of killing and death. The rule of the jungle does not apply anymore, i know its just a Utopian dream but maybe just maybe we will have such a world one day, devoid of hate, where everyone loves the other and we all co-exist in peace....
Anyway i think i have written enough, maybe will post again soon, it did feel good to write a few lines!
Dec 31, 2014
Good Bye 2014
So it is the last day of 2014 and i get the urge to write something, how apt! There i wrote something,see you in 2015! wait i'll write something more, maybe about my year, not that anybody cares anyway, no one reads this blog and hence it has become a diary of sorts!
So my year was ok i think, nothing too exciting happened, on the relationship front i have had absolutely no luck, i think maybe 75% of the fault is mine though in that aspect, i have stopped trying, its like i don't care anymore, but its on days like these that i feel the need for someone more than ever!, to top it off all my ex's well almost all, lets say 70% had babies this year or found out that they were pregnant, again i am happy for them, but you know a little sad as well, i wanted all that i guess, to be with someone and have a family.... i guess i am just not destined for that!!!!
Lets see what else? hmmm , i missed my close friend's wedding which was a big deal i think, have to make it up to him somehow, i was in an accident just last week, luckily came out ok, had bronchitis, damn this is all bad or depressing news, i cannot think of anything positive that happened this year, well my sister moved to ohio, i guess that was a positive thing, she is closer now!!
Anyway lets hope 2015 brings some joy, and i hope the same for everyone else as well, adios and see you next year, enjoy the song!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1D5PtyrewSs
So my year was ok i think, nothing too exciting happened, on the relationship front i have had absolutely no luck, i think maybe 75% of the fault is mine though in that aspect, i have stopped trying, its like i don't care anymore, but its on days like these that i feel the need for someone more than ever!, to top it off all my ex's well almost all, lets say 70% had babies this year or found out that they were pregnant, again i am happy for them, but you know a little sad as well, i wanted all that i guess, to be with someone and have a family.... i guess i am just not destined for that!!!!
Lets see what else? hmmm , i missed my close friend's wedding which was a big deal i think, have to make it up to him somehow, i was in an accident just last week, luckily came out ok, had bronchitis, damn this is all bad or depressing news, i cannot think of anything positive that happened this year, well my sister moved to ohio, i guess that was a positive thing, she is closer now!!
Anyway lets hope 2015 brings some joy, and i hope the same for everyone else as well, adios and see you next year, enjoy the song!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1D5PtyrewSs
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